“Ranger”- a nickname- had worked in a paper mill for almost 40 years. He officially worked in stock prep although he actually worked in the “computer room.” This room was huge as it was about forty years ago when very large computers were just beginning in paper mills. There was plenty of idle time when things were going well so Ranger would tell of his various skills which pretty much ran the range of what a he-man would brag about. He always had a big audience because of his story telling abilities although only one listener was all it took. In fact, he got votes in a couple of state elections as a write-in candidate; but didn’t win.
One night the discussion was about hunting; the other two subjects were almost entirely about women and sports, of course. The discussion drifted into dressing and eating game. As many people in the group were hunters, they ate the game they killed. Ranger allowed that he could skin and dress a rabbit in less than a minute. The folks laughed and afterwords decided to call his hand about his bragging. On night shift, one of the guys brought a rabbit box and set it out behind the filter plant, at the far side of the mill, in some weeds. Sure enough, the next night there was a rabbit in it
The gang gathered in the computer room and asked Ranger again about his story of the time to dress a rabbit, which he repeated. He looked shocked at seeing the rabbit but with bravado told everyone to “Come on.” They followed him to the test station where there was a sink. One person had brought a stop watch and on “GO”, Ranger reached in his pocket; pulled out his knife; opened it on his leg; skinned and dressed the rabbit. The time … 45 seconds! He said, “Boys, when you can back it up, it ain’t braggin’.”
No one challenged him on his deer stories.
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